I was talking to a friend of mine the other day and we had an interesting conversation.
My friend is a youth minister for one of the more healthy Churches of Christ in his area. He has a pretty good youth group that is growing numerically and spiritually. He is a good guy with a great gift for kids.
We have talked a time or two about him coming to Detroit and helping me get something started here. You can tell that every time we talk about it he is a little iffy about whether or not he should actually do it. He has told me several times that he wants to, “I really do, but I am not too thrilled about the idea of quitting my comfortable job here to take a job at Starbucks while we try to get something off the ground.”
And I can’t blame him. It’s a scary thing. A scary thing that I haven’t had to do. I basically moved from one low paying situation into another. I haven’t had the comfort of a great income or comfortable lifestyle to give up to move into a more comfortable position. I can’t really empathize with him because I haven’t been there, but I don’t blame him for his concern. This is how the conversation has gone a couple of times now.
The other day he called me. Before I could really say anything he just says, “Okay man, find me a job at Starbucks.” I laughed and asked him what changed his mind. “I have an issue that constantly is nagging at me and I have to believe that I won’t have this problem if I give everything up and move to Detroit.”
I asked him what that was.
“I bet you never feel like you could be doing more.”
This is, of course, not the case. Most days when I reflect on my conversations or interactions with people I always think of making better of this moment or that. Sometimes I snuggle up with a good book and wonder if I should be out doing something else. The feelings are still there.
But I remember a time when I would sit at work, drive to school or study for classes that I didn’t care about and wonder why I was wasting my time doing those things instead of being out in the world doing Jesus work. The difference between then and now is that I feel like I am wasting far less time–that more of my time is spent on Jesus work. Whereas today I think about this missed opportunity or conversation that could have gone differently, before I felt like I was wasting most of my time. I wasn’t missing a teachable moment, I was missing a lifestyle of service.
I am glad to be in a place where I feel like I am making more of the life I have been given.